Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Life from the eyes of a 5 year old

Kids say the darnedest things. I only wish I could write down everything they have said. I try to at least remember the funniest comments from the day. Lately Jonah has been cracking me up with his views on life and his commentary. Here are just a few of the recent ones...


Jonah: Mom, wouldn't life be sweet if nothing ever "broked" or needed batteries?

Me: Yep, that would be sweet wouldn't it?

Jonah: Yeah...but life's just not like that is it?


Last week Elijah was supposed to be picking up the toys in the basement. I was feeding Isaac so I asked Jonah to check on Elijah for me and see if he was doing what he had been told to do.

Jonah returned and informed me that he wasn't picking up. I told Jonah to tell Elijah this is his last chance. If he doesn't pick up the toys he will get a spanking.

Jonah heads down stairs and I hear the following conversation:

Jonah: Elijah, this is your last chance! Pick up the toys! Do you know what last chance means?

Elijah: No, what does it mean?

Jonah: Well last chance means this is the last time you get a chance at doing something! So you better do it or else!

Elijah: Oh, I see. The last chance.


Jonah and Richard were riding bike to church. They were both riding on the street and when the got to a rough part of the road Jonah headed up the sidewalk. Richard asked him what he was doing and Jonah said, "the road was grumpy and I like it smooth better when I ride bike."


This morning Jonah asked me to help him put new batteries in a toy. I did and it wasn't working so we tried new batteries and he wanted to try to do it himself. After a good attempt he brought it back to me and said:

Jonah: Mom I need a Lucy.

Me: Excuse me? Who is Lucy?

Jonah: No mom! I need you to do a Lucy on my car.

Me: What? I don't know what you mean Jonah. I am sorry. Did you name your car Lucy?

Jonah: Argh! Mom, you know righty tighty lefty a Lucy!


Jonah has been working on time and days of the week lately. He also has been asking me how old he will be when he goes to school this fall and how old everyone else will be.

Jonah: Mom, how old will Isaac be when I go to school?

Me: Umm. He will be 6 months old.

Jonah: Wow! He will be 6! Then he will be older than me because I am only 5 and 6 comes after 5!

Me: No. Isaac isn't 1 yet because he was just born. Remember how there are 7 days in a week and 30 days in a month?

Jonah: Yeah. So he is 7 + 30? That is a BIG number. That comes after 5 too!

Me: No. There are 12 months in a year so Isaac will be 6 months old or 1/2 a year old when you go to school.

Jonah: How many is 1/2 a year?

Me: 6 months Jonah.

Jonah: Oh, so he will be 6! I knew it!

Me: Never mind buddy.


Jonah: Mom you just had one baby in your tummy right?
Me: Yep. Just Isaac, why buddy?

Jonah: Well, just wondering 'cause it looks like the doctor left one in there after she took Isaac out!

Me: Thanks Jonah! That is just my skin and extra stuff from when Isaac was in my tummy. It will take awhile for it to go away.

Jonah: Oh, I thought maybe a baby sister was in there. Bummer!


The other day I was driving and the boys were playing batman and robin. I thought I heard Jonah saying something inappropriately so I reminded them we don't use potty talk.

Jonah: Mom we weren't being unappropriate, we were playing batman and robin at the park.

Me: I thought I heard some potty talk. What are they doing at the park?

Jonah: They are playing with their "booberang"

Me: (trying not to laugh). Their boomerang you mean?

Jonah: Yeah. Their boobemerang.

Me: Jonah it is BOOMERANG. Boom, a loud noise, then erang.

Jonah: Yeah a boobemerang! That is what I said.

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