Thursday, April 22, 2010

He has met me there

The Lord your God is with you
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17

I have been chosen to lead these 6 little feet and
He has met me there

During my days of frustration and feelings of inadequacy as a mother, wife and friend
He has met me there

When I have spent the day in tears wondering just where I have gone wrong
He has met me there

While wondering if my children will ever obey again
He has met me there

When I am exhausted physically, emotionally, and spiritually at the end of the day
He has met me there

With a tear stained face and an aching heart
He has met me there

After I begrudgingly fell to my face in front of the Lord, and realized my mommy makeover wasn't going to start with a wonderful massage, pedicure or manicure (even though that sounds pretty fabulous right now), but a major change in my has been a little better.

During a late night or early morning feeding, when the house was quiet, I spent more time in tears begging the Lord for help. Realizing that I had been going at this all wrong. I was trying to do it all by myself. Why? I am not sure. Perhaps I wanted to be supermom, or just impress my husband. It is pretty rewarding to know that some days I was able to clean the house, bathe all three kids, get a shower in myself, and still manage to stay sane. Other days I find it quite an accomplishment that we are all alive at the end of the day!

When I finally became still and allowed the Lord to be in control, I have been overwhelmed with His love and peace. The tears are still coming, but not because my children are still forcing me to not let my guard down EVER during the day, but because of the love I have felt from the Lord all day.

This love has come in many forms.

When I normally would lose my temper, I have felt peace engulfing me.

When I would have unleashed words that should not have been said I have been silent.

When I have felt like waving the flag of defeat, I have been encouraged.

I have shared this before, but I often need quite a few signs to get back on the path the Lord has set for me when I have tried to travel the wrong way.

I need the flashing detour sings to be a little brighter. I need the sweet voice of the Garmin lady of my GPS system to be a little louder.

Instead of hearing her politely say "in 1.5 miles turn right." When I do travel off course, "recalculating" isn't going to cut it. I usually need a more passionate approach with a little gusto: "HEY LADY? WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING? DID YOU SEE THE SIGNS? YOU ARE GOING THE WRONG WAY!"

So I have been humbled after reading emails and texts from friends filled with notes of encouragement! These have all been received exactly when I needed them. I even had one in the mail! Thank you for taking the time to reach out!

I love listening to music and often have itunes playing on the computer set to random during the day. The Lord has also used the music to meet me when I have needed it.

Even though most of my challenges have surrounded my children, the Lord has used them as well. I have been trying to cherish the little things during the day and not let the big things weigh be down so greatly.

It's pretty hard to not smile when your 5 year old almost hyperventilates with excitement asking you if you knew that squirrels could run on fences. Or if while praying with your 3 year old for Jesus to make his "owie" better he interrupts you and wants you to pray for Jesus to heal the owie "like when he touched the man and healed him all better in the bible story we read mommy"

When I lay in bed at the end of each day feeling defeated
He has met me there

When I open my eyes in the morning dreading what it will bring
He has met me there

The beautiful thing is I don't have to worry or be fearful
Because He has already met me there.

I may not be supermom, or have a clean house or even get to shower every day but I do know

the Lord loves me despite my shortcomings.

I am not much different than my toddlers who need frequent reminders.

He will never leave me and is right beside me through it all.

The best part is each day is another chance to travel down that path

And just maybe today the sweet Garmin lady won't even have to yell at me!

1 comment:

Thomas said...

WooHOO! Amen! Great post Becky. Loving and praying you through this. Cindy