Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Not a fan of sharing Momma!

Guess who is not a fan of sharing his momma?
Yep. Elijah.

The past few weeks have been...rough for Elijah.

We prepared ourselves for a storm when Isaac was born because we knew it would be hard on Elijah after being the baby for the past 3 1/2 years. We braced ourselves for major issues and regression and possibly aggression toward Isaac.

We were pleasantly surprised that we only experienced a small storm when Isaac did arrive. Elijah seemed to adjust better than we could have imagined.

However, after having Isaac on the other side of the womb for 5 weeks today, the storm has arrived.

It has been slowly building intensity over the past few weeks.

Now it has reached it's max and we are all looking for shelter and bracing for impact!

Elijah has spent his days complaining about anything possible from his scratchy skin, to a runny nose, clothes that don't fit right, pain in his legs, to other issues that I won't go into detail about on here. At first I wasn't sure if this was attention seeking behavior or legitimate concerns.

I have done a few scientific tests that have proven that Elijah is NOT a fan of sharing his momma. What kind of tests you wonder? Well, I suppose I can share my data with you.

If Elijah is having a good day, or rather a good moment, I will take advantage of it and spend some quality time with him (reading a story, snuggling, playing legos, etc). After I have loved on him for a bit, I will tell him I need to do something else...
Test #1= "Elijah I have to go put a load of laundry in I will be right back"
Result #1= " Ok mom, but then you can play with me?"

Test #2= "Elijah I have to feed Isaac now, but than I can play with you"
Result #2= "My legs hurt, my back is scratchy, my nose is running, etc..."
(at the top of his lungs, while whining and throwing himself around)

I have been trying not to draw extra attention to the storms or tantrums and offering to help "fix" his problem (ex: blowing nose, putting on lotion, etc) and if he refuses help just telling him he can fuss and whine on his bed and when he is ready to be a big boy he can get up. This has been working for now, but I am hoping it won't last forever.

I have also been trying to give him some extra one on one attention. On Sunday he and I went to Target to run some errands and we went on a date to Starbucks. We had a blast while we were there and he didn't fuss once. We pulled into the driveway and the storm erupts again.

Fortunately he has NOT been taking this out on his little brother. The funniest part is that if Isaac is fussing while Elijah is having one of his emotional breakdowns, he will stop the tantrum and attend to his brother's needs. He will turn off the tantrum, run to Isaac's aid and offer him his pacifier, a song, etc

The warmer weather has helped a little and I have been able to send the older two outside to play while I take care of Isaac/or the house.

I have also been trying to not take these years for granted. Even though I have felt like I couldn't handle anymore storms and just need a little sunshine, I know this will pass. I also know I would take the storm over no Elijah any day! I also have friends who are dealing with infertility, mourning the death of their child, or watching their child fight cancer!

My troubles seem pretty insignificant when I look at the bigger picture! The one that includes 3 adorable healthy boys. The three boys that have given me the title Momma.

So while I am waiting for the storm to pass and the sunshine again...
I will be spending a little extra time with my middle man.

Sorry your world was turned upside down 'Lou...I love you and am praying for sunshine again!

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