Flashback Friday

I know Friday is almost over, but here is a little flashback...

  Wednesday somehow the topic of eating dog food came up with the boys, Richard and myself, and my grandpa Tony.  We were getting ready to eat supper and I believe my Grandpa was teasing the boys about what they were eating and if it was dog food.  Jonah was disgusted by this thought and was repulsed that some people have eaten dog food.  Apparently Richard was frequently found at the dog dish as a child munching on some kibbles 'n bits if he needed a little snack. (For those of you who know Richard this probably won't be a surprise because he does eat ANYTHING).  The picture above is actually Elijah, at my parents house, getting into their dog's food.  I don't think he had eaten very much of it when we found him, but I did have to take the picture of course.  Jonah was still disgusted by the thought of eating dog food and Elijah seemed to find slight pleasure in the thought. That isn't surprising either I guess.  

Too bad I don't have the picture of Richard snacking away to post on here. Now that would be fun!  I guess I better be careful if we ever get a dog, although it can't be that bad for you...can it?

Wordless Wednesday

The Pied Piper

Where is Spring?

I had wanted to post these pictures last week, but due to my poor little Elijah getting so sick and puking for 4 days I am a little behind. 

It was unusually warm last week (30-40s) and I sent the boys out to play one day before lunch while I cleaned up a bit and got lunch ready.  They were in the backyard playing and I could easily keep an eye on them from the kitchen.  (One of the features of our house we loved, plus the fenced in backyard). 

Jonah came in and told me had a great idea and that we could have a picnic, because it was so nice out. I told him that despite the balmy temps (34 degrees) we would have to post pone our picnic until later. He was a little disappointed, but ran back outside to play. 

At one point after that, I looked outside and saw this...

It made me smile as they pulled their chairs all over the yard and tipped their heads back to catch some rays on their face. Only instead of being able to bask in the sunshine they would tip over into the snow! They were laughing so hard I thought they were going to have a seizure!

I didn't pay attention to the weather forecast for this week since I was tending to a patient at home all weekend.  I was hopeful for weather similar to last week so we could enjoy it outside instead of from the couch with puke buckets, but when I looked outside this morning this is what I saw...

Definitely NOT spring weather, in fact we are at the beginning of a blizzard warning for the next few days!  However, the snowflakes falling this morning were some of the largest  I have seen in a long time!  How beautiful it was and I found myself marveling in the beauty of the Lord.  Like the fresh snow, making everything pretty and white when we least expect it. 

Puke patrol

So last night I got a call at work from Richard (who never calls unless there is an emergency) and he told me Elijah was puking! Sunday he called to tell me Jonah had swallowed a penny! Good thing I don't work more ;0)  

My wonderful husband called in sick to work and stayed up all night (literally) to be on puke patrol with Elijah while I stayed at work. I came home slept for a few hours and got up for an appointment leaving him on puke patrol still.  He did an excellent job taking care of my baby while I couldn't and now I am taking over while he returns to work tomorrow. 

Thanks Richard for being such a great daddy, husband and puke policeman!  I love watching you care for our boys, even when it isn't so fun.  

Tomorrow I have a feeling I will be washing a lot of laundry and watching a lot of batman!

Train your Brain to Praise His Name

I have shared often how much I enjoy hearing God speak to me when I am struggling with something and He goes to great lengths to get my attention.  He usually uses people, books, music, phone calls, etc throughout a matter of days/weeks to help me understand something He is trying to teach me.  

For awhile now I have been working on Praising the Lord not just when things are good, or when he answers a prayer, or for blessings, but to do this when it is the last thing I want to do.  It isn't easy.  A few months ago I found myself coming to Him in prayer more and feeling my relationship blossom, but realizing that I need to Praise the Lord for the tough stuff too. 

I think this change of heart and new way of thinking has been fruit of losing Grace and the inability to get pregnant since.  I have been really focusing on training my brain to do what is least natural for me when I am frustrated, depressed, sad, angry, or just having a bad day.  When all I want to do is scream at the top of my lungs, cry, run away, or hide from whatever isn't desirable at the time instead I Praise His Name.  

Like I said before, it isn't easy.  It has been a struggle to say the least, but God is good.  I have fallen to my knees in my darkest hours and instead of  questioning my Savior or my situation, I thank Him.  This has transformed from major issues I struggle with to daily struggles.  So as I Praise His Name for my child in heaven and empty womb I am also Praising Him for rough days with toddlers, road rage, burnt dinner, being late because I had to change a poopy diaper as we were walking out the door, sleepless nights, and much more.  

As I train my brain to do what is so hard, I find my first reaction is often Praising the Lord in these situations instead of cursing under my breath or clenching my jaw.  I haven't perfected this yet and I am sure I never will, but every day is a new day and every day is another chance to try this new way of thinking.  Each day the Lord is making this easier for me. Of course there are times where it just feels good to let out a scream, have a good cry, or vent to a great friend too.

How has God been letting me know I am on the right track?  He has used Jonah, who I did briefly discuss this with awhile ago.  I told him I was working on saying thank you to Jesus for days that are hard or things that make me sad because He is always there and will help me feel better.  Jonah has reminded me a time or two when my first reaction isn't to Praise. I also bought a devotional for mom's a few weeks ago and guess what yesterday's devotional was about? Yep, praising the Lord when it's the last thing you want to do. I also heard Him in the car the other day when I had initially turned the radio off for my ride home from work and turned it on just minutes before pulling into the driveway.  I was feeling sorry for myself and frustrated, but decided to praise the Lord for the situation rather than be angry at it.  After some praising I turned the radio on and heard Casting Crowns' Praise You In this Storm. (I listened to this song a lot after my miscarriage and found comfort from it.  It also came on the radio the day we found out the Kochan family had lost Avery tragically last May.) 

Not until that moment did I truly realize what the Lord had been trying to teach me since.  (If you aren't familiar with that song it is in my playlist at the bottom of this blog.)  The chorus is what hits home and causes me to tear up every time:

And I'll praise you in this storm

        and I will lift my hands

        for You are who You are

        no matter where I am

        and every tear I've cried

        You hold in your hand

        You never left my side

        and though my heart is torn

        I will praise You in this storm

Will you join me and Train Your Brain to Praise His Name? Let me know if you're up for the challenge so I can pray for you too!

Don't grow up Elijah!

Over the past few months my baby, Elijah, has become more and more of a "big boy" and I wish I could freeze time and enjoy this just a little longer.  He is so different than his brother and also from myself, which I fear will bring conflict as he gets older.  He is 2 1/2 years old and trying to be so much older as he follows Jonah and does as he does.  

I know everyone tells you not to compare your children to others and not even within your own family, but honestly who doesn't do that? Elijah was a different baby from the start and Jonah did set the bar pretty high so I have spent most of his little life holding him to those standards...until recently.  When I finally realized what will happen all too soon. He will grow up. If you haven't already figured it out, I am a VERY emotional girl.  A feature that I have grown to love about myself and enjoy watching the Lord weave this aspect of myself into my very being.  I have found this becoming more evident as I became a mother and grow as one. I fought it for many years and tried to ignore it fearing it was a sign of weakness or imperfection.  God has helped me see that He created me this way for a reason. Simple as that. Who am I to stand up against His plan? 

I am treasuring these toddler days and cherishing the special moments we have together praying our relationship will only flourish as Elijah grows and matures.  Like I said before, he was different from the start. Unlike his loud, colicky, social brother, he was a very happy, quiet, content baby.  He did things on his own time and I have learned you can't make him do anything he is not ready for. He crawled, walked, and TALKED when he wanted to, not when I thought he should.  He has a wild streak in him and I pray daily the Lord will use that to do great things.  I can hardly wait to see how God molds him and shapes him as he grows.  I feel I will spend many days and nights on my knees for this boy.  I am not sure if God is preparing my heart for that or if that is just my motherly instinct kicking in, but I am not ignoring it. 

He has also, unlike his brother, been a momma's boy from the start. Which I LOVE, of course it has its moments, but I am cherishing this too while it lasts.  I also love his current choice phrases and little "Elijahisms" and wanted to record them here so I don't forget them. 

• "See you soon!" -used whenever he leaves the room
• Anytime a sentence should include "we" he substitutes "us"- ADORABLE!
• "Momma, you look like a princess"- this melts my heart of course. He is "the man" (who that is I am not sure), Jonah is the prince and I am the princess. 
• He loves playing with my hair when he needs to be comforted
• He lets me kiss and hug him all day long, despite his "tough guy" appearance
• "No problem" -of course this is used in and out of the correct context. 
• He prays before meals the same way every time.  He makes fists with his hands, places them on the edge of the table, bends over and places his eyes over his fists.  He also frequently thanks God for his robin costumes (that he still wears almost daily)
• He also is concerned if I am going to give Jonah a "spankin" and tells me not to do it.
• He refuses to be covered up by his blankets in bed, but frequently ends up next to me at night because he "is so cold and scared" (I can't resist of course).
• When he is sorry and apologizing he leans over a little and shrugs his shoulders, tilts his head a little sideways and says he loves you after the apology. 
• He comes to me through the day and says "momma, just hold me" and won't let me put him down until he is ready. 
• He will not let me call him peanut, honey, sweetie, or anything of the sort. He is usually a superhero instead.
• If you ask him what his full name is he will probably tell you Elijah Rock (a nickname from Richard)
• I started calling him Elijah Lou or Lou Lou when he was little and he does let me call him that most of the time.
• He also "wants to me just like Jonah when he growds up" 

I thank God for blessing us with you Elijah.  You are so sweet and I love you with all my heart. Don't worry about growing up too fast, just stay my baby a little longer!  

Love Mommy

Flashback Friday

Jonah came and climbed in bed this morning with Richard and I shortly before Richard had to get up for work. He LOVES to snuggle and I am enjoying this while it still lasts.  I know I will be sad the day our boys are too cool or too old to do this!  I was thinking about how big he is getting and remembering so distinctly some fun memories of him. I love you so much little man and I pray God continues to work in your big heart and bring you closer to Him. Here they are!

Riding the Carousel at the Mall and swinging at the little park by Emerald St in Iowa City.

This first ride on the carousel was fun and I remember Jonah was a little nervous. It was his 7 month birthday and every time the carousel would rise he would giggle nervously and his eyes would get even bigger and when it would fall I would feel his little body relax. 

The little park near our 2 bedroom apartment on Emerald St was a fun one for us 3 to go to and Jonah LOVED the swings!  He would giggle and giggle as you pushed him.  Often Richard would bring homework and a blanket and Jonah and I would play while he studied.  Every once and awhile Jonah would cruise over to daddy and try to crawl on him while he studied. 

Cheering on the Hawks with "Auntie Em" and cruising around in his birthday suit!

I met Emily freshman year, we rowed together, and she was a bridesmaid in our wedding. We have tried to stay in touch since and the boys have seen her enough to know who she is and that means so much to me. She is a great friend and I look forward to continuing our friendship as the years roll by. She is almost a Doctor! So proud of you Em!

Jonah also loved being naked. He will maybe hate me later for writing this, but oh well.  He especially loved running around after a bath and we would yell out "naked boy alert" and he would laugh and laugh. 

Taking things out of the drawers and putting them back. This was by far one of his favorite past times!  Every mom needs a drawer for kiddos to do this with. 

Jonah also loved taking this out/off/making messes, but unlike most children he enjoyed cleaning up the mess almost as much as he enjoyed making it!  Definitely his father's son!  He loved taking the DVD's off the shelf, the tupperware out of the drawer, scrounging through our drawers and pulling socks/underwear out. He was really "helpful" with the laundry!  

Thanks for the flashback and walk down memory lane. Love you little man!